Dear Theological Duo: As both a big Jesus fan and Tom Hanks fan, I can’t decide whether to see The Da Vinci Code or not. Can you give me a good theological argument for boycotting this film? --- Jim Wainscott, Tempe, AZ

Maurice: I hear you, Jimbo. You can hardly go wrong with a Tom Hanks movie, even when it’s questioning the validity of Scripture. Seems a shame to let any pesky allegiance to the Gospel stand in the way of good entertainment. 

Emmett: That’s why I avoid the usual cogent theological arguments against the film and go straight to the “Evil Opie” argument to appeal to baby boomers like Jim.

Maurice: Evil Opie?

Emmett: That’s right. As you may know, the director of The Da Vinci Code is Ron Howard, a former child actor who played Opie Taylor on The Andy Griffith Show in the 1960s. For anyone who saw the satanic overtones of this boy’s depraved behavior on that show, it should give any God-fearing moviegoer second thoughts about seeing Opie’s new film.

Maurice: Wow, I'm surprised Floyd the barber didn't find 666 etched on the boy's scalp.

Emmett: Case in point: Episode 64 titled “Opie’s Rival” that originally aired December 3, 1962. Little Opie becomes jealous of Andy’s new girlfriend, Peggy, and precedes to blatantly sabotage their relationship with cunning trickery. I get a chill down my spine just thinking about the sinister look in Opie’s eyes when he purposely loses a note from Peggy that he was supposed to give to Andy.

Maurice: Not to mention the many other episodes where we witness Opie kill a mother bird, lie about his school grades, and later form a teen rock band.

Emmett: Exactly. Is this the kind of person that we can trust to produce proper Hollywood entertainment about Christianity for Christians? I think not. Boycott this film, Jim, before the ungodly influence of Evil Opie spreads any further.

Maurice: Aunt Bea must be rolling in her grave.

Emmett: Hey, I’m serious, Maurice. My life is in danger just exposing the "Evil Opie/Da Vinci Code" connection. Need I mention the sudden death of Don Knotts just months before the movie’s premiere? He knew too much.

Maurice: ‘Nuff said... Nip it. Nip it in the bud.